Reviewed by Lugubrious (10/22/04):
The time has come for the Oriental world to have its revenge on the ears of whitey. Prepare yourself for the devastation of Say Bok Gwai, self-described Canto-Core. Imagine a really bad Asian flick made by drunk hardcore and grindcore fans, and you just might have the idea. The music itself is 30 tracks of short and simple hardcore riffs with hardcore beats, nothing spectacular or out of the ordinary. What stands out is the old school dialect, screaming for vengeance in this white man's world, and for some damn chop sticks!! Who the hell stole this guy's chop-sticks?! Just give them back and no one will be hurt. I'm telling you this slant-eyed demon is getting quite irate, and he just might be trying to invoke ancient dragons to wreak havoc on the modern world.
If this was meant to be serious at all I am unable to tell, for it is one of those things that make me laugh until tears come streaming down. Others, such as a good friend of mine, will end up in a state of panic anytime impressions of Say Bok Gwai are made. Fans of Estrogenocide, Gronibard, and Crotchduster will be sure to enjoy this, if not for the music then for the great laughs you and your friends will share for years to come. GIVE ME MY STIR FRY AND SAKI, DON'T FUCK WITH SAY BOK GWAI!!! This truly is terrifying. metaljudgement.com
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Disc: Say Bok Gwai
Insufficient Description of Sound: Proudly declaring itself "San Francisco's first Chinese-American hardcore band," Say Bok Gwai specializes in angry ninety-second blasts with titles like "Special Won Ton Soup," "White Demon Stir Fry," "No Chop Suey" and "Chili Relleno Why You Buggin'" featuring badass Black Flag guitars and irate dudes hooting indignantly in Cantonese. It splits pretty evenly between terrifying and absolutely hilarious.
Unifying Lyrical Statement: Beats the hell outta me.
Sex Appeal? None particularly, though the lyrics to "Stick It In" are Don't be afraid to stick it in/Pull it out and do it again.
Idealized Listening Environment: The set of Big Trouble and Little China, in which Kurt Russell has been replaced by Ian MacKaye.
Bonus Fact: New songs the duo's debuted since Say Bok Gwai's release include "Fuck Bush" and "Fuck a Ronnie Reagan."
By Rob Harvilla East Bay Express